Bin Brennan

I met Ben Brennan at Ricks College, in Rexburg, Idaho.  As you can see from the picture below, I'm not sure why he wanted to be friends with me!

A mutual friend of ours, Ana, brought Ben over one day after a dance class.  It wasn't a gradual friendship for me.  It was instant.  He was unlike any boy I had ever known and he just had to be in my life.  Until I married David, about 2 years later, Bin Brennan was my best guy friend.  Ah, did you catch that?  Yes, Bin.  With my weird accent, I never pronounced his name "Ben" so when he would call our apartment, the girls would just write "Bin" on the white board.  It stuck and to this day, I call him Bin.

After all that practice dancing with my roommates and I, Bin and I went to an actual dance on the college campus.

After graduating from Ricks college, we both ended up in Provo, Utah.  He was always the smart one so he was going to BYU while I was trying to gain my residency in Utah to attend another school there.  He was busy but, always the good friend, he made time when I was having a bad day and needed to go on one of our walks.

Halloween 1999

Here is one of my very favorite pictures.  It makes me giggle everytime I see it.  Bin was at mine and David's wedding reception and I had to get a picture of us with him.  You have to understand how close I was to Bin....I just naturally turned into him for the picture instead of my own husband!  I didn't even realize it until Bin started to laugh.  I asked him what was so funny and he said that when I get the pictures back, if someone looks at that picture first, they won't know who I married!  Ahahahaahahaha!

Before I knew it, Bin was dating a girl named Laurel.  David and I were living in Idaho at the time but we were coming down to the Provo area for Thanksgiving.  Ana and I decided we were going to check this girl out.  We went out to eat and......WE FELL IN LOVE WITH LAUREL!

Sometime had passed but like it strangly happened a few times before and after, the Brennan Family and Adams Family ended up in the same city/town. We were in Rexburg, Idaho for David to get his Bachelors Degree while the Brennans were up there to teach at BYU-Idaho.

Being so far away from family can be hard sometimes but Ben and Laurel sure made it easier knowing we had them as our family to hang out with during the holidays....

...and baby blessings (even when we moved yet again)...

...and friendly get togethers.

This is my other favorite picture!  You know when you meet someone that you just love and you really hope that your spouse will love them and their spouse too?  It doesn't always work out that way, huh?  Not for us!  We were so blessed to care so much for each other.

We were living in Oklahoma at this point and the Brennans came by to visit us.  I think I had just put "rabbit ears" behind Bin's head and got caught in this picture.  I'm pretty sure I denied it.  Our friendship has always been real mature!  

Lets take a break and show some kiddo pictures through the years.

At one point, our family was living in California.  The Brennans were visiting Laurel's family so we were blessed with a quick visit.

And then we moved to where Bin and Laurel were in Utah.

During their time in Utah, we celebrated birthdays...

...and just hung out.

But before we knew it, it was time for the Brennans to move to California so that Bin could start his practice.  Dr. Brennan it was now.  He got to see our Joseph "Ruger" as an infant but I never got to met his Joseph born 2 years ago.  And that is what really hurts.  Knowing it had been over 2 years since I had seen Bin.  And just like time had been flying by, I received a letter in the mail that Bin had stage 4 stomach cancer.  Though I would have never let him know it while he was alive, I cried harder reading that letter than any other news I have ever received.  Any.  The only thing I can compare it to is losing my beloved Grandma Thatcher.  It was hard and I cried hard but the grief was replaced with joy because of my memories that came to me with her sooner than I had expected.  I told myself that was probably happening because I knew where she was also.  When I do geneology work, I feel connected to her.  I think that helps.  

But this?  This has been tough.  But why?  I know where he is too!  Why do tears well up at random times still?  I was talking to my friend Laura about it and she helped me realize something.  She told me that I have always known I would outlive my Grandma.  Deep down, I expected it.  But Bin, he's not supposed to die.  Not like this.  Not this young.

So I'm holding onto Laura's wisdom and David's words of comfort that he tells me here and there, "It's ok to not be ok" or "Everyone grieves differently.  It's ok to still cry, Alisa."

Benjamin Joseph Brennan

March 15, 1974 - November 23, 2021