David and I were asked to give a talk in Sacrament meeting tomorrow. This is what I wrote:
Good afternoon Brothers and Sisters. My name is Alisa Adams and yes I am reading my talk to you today. I am not only very nervous but I’m also,
plain and simple, not good with speaking in front of a lot of people. I tend to not make sense after a while and so
to play it safe, I have written this talk beforehand in the comfort of mine and
David’s home to make this a little less awkward for both you and I this afternoon.
Mine and David’s family have been in this ward for a few
months now. We have 4 boys ranging from
ages of 3 to 15. We moved here from Utah
but I grew up in Northeast Oklahoma in a little town called Jay. So you can imagine that when David got his
job offer to work in Oklahoma for a little bit, I was more than thrilled. This move is our 15th move in 16
years of marriage. Sometimes we tell
people we are gypsies and other times we tell people we are running from the
law. Both sound better than realizing
that more than likely we are just a little crazy for moving so much.
We were asked to give a talk on the scriptures in Alma 5
verses 13-16. They read:
“13 And
behold, he preached the word unto your fathers, and a mighty change
was also wrought in their hearts, and they humbled themselves and put
their trust in the true and living God. And behold, they were
faithful until the end; therefore they were saved.
14 And
now behold, I ask of you, my brethren of the church, have
ye spiritually been born of God? Have ye received his image in
your countenances? Have ye experienced this mighty change in your
hearts?
15 Do
ye exercise faith in the redemption of him who created you? Do
you look forward with an eye of faith, and view this mortal body raised in immortality,
and this corruption raised in incorruption, to stand before God to
be judged according to the deeds which have been done in the mortal
body?
16 I
say unto you, can you imagine to yourselves that ye hear the voice of the Lord,
saying unto you, in that day: Come unto me ye blessed, for behold, your
works have been the works of righteousness upon the face of the earth?”
These
scriptures come from the mouth of Alma as he was delivering them to the members
of the Church, living in Zarahelma. As I
read it, I couldn’t help but realize how much they apply to us members of the
Church in these latter days. Granted,
these people were descendants of people who had escaped from under the rule of
King Noah and soon after that were put in bondage under the Lamanites; and so
these people that Alma was talking to didn’t have first hand knowledge of what
had happened BUT they did know the stories.
Before these 4 verses that I read to you, Alma spoke to the people of
remembering what their fathers had been through. How they had been reminded through the years
through the stories. Does that not sound
like us and our modern-day Prophets and how they remind us often of what those
before us have been through?
I
would like to read a quote from President James E Faust given back in October
of 2003. His talk was titled, “Lord, I
Believe; Help Thou Mine Unbelief.” But before
I read this, I want to share with you a personal struggle. Not a public confessing, but I want to help
you understand how touching this was for me to find this talk. I have always loved the story in the New
Testament of the brave father who came to the Savior in hopes of healing his
son. It may even be my favorite healing
story in the New Testament. I love it so
much because I feel as if I can relate.
I
have struggled with the idea of “knowing” certain things, for a long time
now. Phrases often heard in the Church
at the pulpit are that of, “I know that the Church is true” or “I know that
Joseph Smith was prophet of God.” When I
was younger, I thought I did know these things.
I had a many times before, bore my testimony at the pulpit saying these
very words.
I remember,
in my youth, a lady bearing her testimony once that the words to the hymn “I
Believe in Christ” should be changed to “I know of Christ.” That is bothered her that it wasn’t more bold
in ones statement that we know without a doubt that Christ is every bit
real. I remember, at the time, loving
her testimony. But as a youth, I would
have never guessed that years later I would be faced with grief so strong and
very real that I would doubt that once “known” belief that I had once had. How does one deal with the emotional stress
that you couldn’t possibly be worthy of Christ’s atoning sacrifice if you
doubted something that everyone else seems to know so easily? I suddenly found myself loving that Hymn of
“I Believe in Christ” just as it was. I
also found myself loving that dear father in the New Testament that found
himself without a perfect knowledge of belief because guess what? That doubt, with an underling desperate want
to believe, was enough for our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. He loved that father very much and was still
going to bless his son, even in his unbelief.
President
Faust said,
“This morning I would like to bear a humble testimony to those
who have personal struggles and doubts concerning the divine mission of The
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Many of us are at times like the
father who asked the Savior to heal his child with the “dumb spirit.” The
father of the child cried out, “Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.”1 To all those
with lingering doubts and questions, there are ways to help your unbelief. In
the process of accepting and rejecting information in the search for light,
truth, and knowledge, almost everyone has—at one time or another—some private
questions. That is part of the learning process.
Sustaining faith can be the ultimate comfort in life. All of us
must find our own testimonies.”
I believe the Spirit lead me to finding this talk, given that we
have a new prophet who has shaken things up a bit with new ways of doing things
in the Church. Some of us just knew all
these changes were right. Some of us had to find out for ourselves that
it was the Lord’s will. But as President
Faust taught, either is ok. And as Alma
was teaching in verse 15, sometimes we have to exercise our faith.
This excersing of our faith, as we find things to be true for
ourselves, leads to verse 16. I would
like to read that verse again:
“16 I
say unto you, can you imagine to yourselves that ye hear the voice of the Lord,
saying unto you, in that day: Come unto me ye blessed, for behold, your
works have been the works of righteousness upon the face of the earth?”
This is such a good reminder to me of how important our works
are. Especially when we are in those
stages of our lives where we doubt our worthiness. Brothers and Sisters, I hope that you hear me
when I say that I really do believe that the most important things that pass
over into the eternities, are our works.
It just makes sense to me. It
makes sense to me that a loving Father would want his children to not only act
on those things He asks of us, but to even more importantly feel the blessings
that come from it. I also personally
feel that through our helping of others is when we get our answers that we are
so desperately looking for. So my advice
to any of you who are struggling with any belief questions would be to get out and
serve. I have personally experienced
questions that were answered when doing just that. I have also experienced a time in my life
when I couldn’t give anymore and that is when the Lord sent people in the
Church to do what I could not do anymore.
Because of this experience, I truly do believe and have a testimony that
the Lord will take care of things. All
things. My sister has a saying that I
love. She says, “Trust that the Lord
loves those people in your lives just as much, actually more, than you love
them. He will make sure that they are
taken care of when you can do no more.”
Brothers and Sisters, I hope we are exercising our faith as it
is spoken of in verse 15. Sometimes it
is all we can do and that is ok. That is
one of the beautiful things about the gospel of Jesus Christ. Do what we can and then He will take care of
the rest.
On that note I’d like to share part of a talk given in October
2016 General Conference given by Elder J. Devn Cornish. I think he sums it up very well in how often
we are struggling with comparing ourselves to others or just plain and simple,
letting Satin trick us into thinking we are not doing enough and so there fore
we are not enough. He said,
“Please, my beloved brothers and sisters, we must stop comparing
ourselves to others. We torture ourselves needlessly by competing and
comparing. We falsely judge our self-worth by the things we do or
don’t have and by the opinions
of others. If we must compare, let us compare how we were in
the past to how we are today—and even to how we want to be in the future. The
only opinion of us that matters is what our Heavenly Father thinks of us.
Please sincerely ask Him what He thinks of you. He will love and correct but
never discourage us; that is Satan’s trick.
Let me be direct and clear. The answers to the questions “Am I
good enough?” and “Will I make it?” are “Yes! You are going to be good enough”
and “Yes, you are going to make it as long as you keep repenting and do not
rationalize or rebel.” The God of heaven is not a heartless referee looking for
any excuse to throw us out of the game. He is our perfectly loving Father, who
yearns more than anything else to have all of His children come back home and
live with Him as families forever. He truly gave His Only Begotten Son that we might
not perish but have everlasting life!1 Please
believe, and please take hope and comfort from, this eternal truth. Our
Heavenly Father intends for us to make it! That is His work and His glory.2”
This made me think back to about 15 years ago when David and I
were apartment managers at BYU-Idaho. We
were in a training meeting when at one point Elder Bednar got up to give us
some advice. As apartment managers of a
small house that was divided up into just a few apartments, we had the
responsibility of the residency “parents” as well. We were supposed to check in
on the single girls, at times, in the other apartments to make sure they were
home at cerfew. But Elder Bednar made it
clear that we were not to, as he put it, “be hiding in the bushes” waiting for
them to come home late every night. I
learned 2 things from him at that training.
1. I could use that advice as a parent. My purpose is not to hide in the “bushes”
just waiting for my kids to mess up on a daily bases. I am not here to just punish them. I am to love them.
2. I could
use that advice to realize just how my Heavenly Father sees me. He is not hiding in the “bushes” just waiting
to point out my flaws and then punish me.
He loves me. He knows of my
weaknesses but He also knows of my many talents.
I would like to end my talk by sharing a part of a song that I
love. If I were brave, I’d sing it to
you but I’m not so you will have to bear with listening to me talk just a
little bit longer. The song is “More
Than You Think I Am” by Danny Gokey. I
want to share it with you because it goes with the second part of what I
learned from Elder Bednar. The Lord
loves me. He is not up in heaven with a
gavel in his hand just waiting to condem me.
The song says:
“You always think I'm
somewhere on a mountain top
But never think behind bars
You'd be amazed the places that I'd go to be with you
Where you are
So forget what you've heard
What you think that you know
There's a lot about me
That's never been told
I'm more than you dreamed
More than you understand
Your days and your times
Were destined for our dance
I catch all your tears
Burn your name on my heart
Be still and trust my plan
I'm more than you think I am (am, am, oh)
More than you think I am (am, am, oh)
Rumor has it there's a gavel in my hand
I'm only here to condemn
But let me tell you secrets you would've never known
I think of you as my best friend”