Looks who's 40 now!

The class of 96 are turning or have already turned 40 this year.  I feel so blessed that my family and I get to be in Oklahoma the year that my friends turn 40 so that I can celebrate with them.  Pounce's birthday was the day before Mother's Day this year so it worked out perfectly that I got to see her and spent time with Grandma and Mom on that weekend.

I hope that Pounce really was surprised but even if she wasn't, it was so good to be able to celebrate HER!

Some of her friends even came from Arkansas to see her, like Valerie and Jennifer and didn't stop there.  They brought the cake and sash and much love that I hope proved to Pounce just how much we need her in our lives.

This "gun" photo is my very favorite!

Robyn had left at this point but if she were still there she would have been in these pictures.  I wanted pictures of us class of 96 girls who turned 40 this year.

I know I say it a lot but I can't help but repeating.  I have been blessed with the most wonderful of friends.  We hurt and cry, love and laugh, and so much more but we do it together.

My Laura

This is my beautiful friend, Laura.  When I think of my oldest and dearest friend, I think of her.  I know I had other friends before I moved to Jay, OK in 4th grade but she is the one I remember being my first friend when we moved there.  And she stayed my friend from then on.  We were typical friends in the sense that we fought but we loved each other also.  As we got older and moved away, we didn't get to always stay in each others life like we would have wanted to but it was always important to me that I never lose contact with her.  She meant way to much to me to ever forget her.

 The week before Mother's Day her Grandmother "Granny" died.  Granny lived here in the Oklahoma City area so when she and her boys needed somewhere to stay they stayed with our family.  It was such a blessing for me to be able to do that for her.  Her boys got to spend time with my boys while she was dealing with hard things that come with getting ready for a funeral.

One of the greatest things that came out of this for me was the opening up of Laura and her childhood.  We were so close but I didn't really know much of anything about her family and background.  Looking back now, there was so much I didn't tell her and so much she didn't tell me.  I know I could have trusted her but I just didn't open up about personal things back then.  And she herself just couldn't tell me what was going on.  I guess what I'm trying to get at is that it is so nice to grow older.  I so enjoyed all that she shared with me during those 3 days.  

 Years ago, probably around when we were 16 or so, Laura's sister Stephanie spent a few weeks with Laura.  She was younger than we were but I loved her immediately.  I hadn't seen her since that summer, so many years ago, but with Granny passing I was able to see her again.  They are such beautiful sisters and friends.

I love this picture of her because it shows off her new tattoo.  It is special to her because her daughter is the one that put it on her.  It describes her perfectly to me.  I don't know that Laura even had 1 tattoo before Skye started tattoos but once Skye started that hobby, Laura wanted to support it.  Because she loves her daughter in all things, I think she has 3 tattoos now.

I'm so grateful for my friends.  What they teach me.  How much they have loved me through the years, even through the miles that have separated us.

Mother's Day 2018

David, the boys, and I went to Jay for the weekend of Mother's Day.  

 I thought I'd be a brat and make my present to Mom and Grandma a funny one! 

 "I'm sorry you had to raise such spoiled brats like my siblings.  Happy Mother's Day from your favorite child!"

 I love these 2 pictures of Mom and Grandma so much!  They both look so beautiful.

 "I'm sorry you had such spoiled brats like my siblings for Grandchildren.  Happy Grandmother's Day!  From the one who didn't sucker punch her newborn baby sister right in front of you.  You know, the non brat sibling."

So this picture cracks me up because it looks like April is asking Grandma what happened and Grandma is caught!

The reason behind Grandma's drink is that apparently I was jealous of the new baby sister, April, and punched her clear back in 1980.  It's one of those stories that gets retold throughout the years.  It's one of those stories that seem to change each time I hear it but that is one of the reasons I love it.  It's part of me.  Plus, I remember learning once that that is how you can tell if a story is made up or not.  It will slightly change over long periods of time because your memory of it changes.  The brain is interesting, huh?

Stinchcomb

This journal entry will be a picture overload of multiple times of hiking, biking, and tree jumping at Stinchcolm in Bethany.  David found this place for me after our getaway in Tulsa.  He was trying to find more places for me to hike.

The first time it was just him and I that went.  I didn't take even one picture.  I almost regret it now but I really just wanted to enjoy the new place as well as the time spent with David.  The trail is not used often, you can tell, because there is a lot of over growth but it almost felt as if the forest/woods was hugging us in a way.  

 The following day, we took the boys.  Hyrum and I went on the hiking trail while David and the older boys rode their bikes (Ruger was with Nanny and Poppy). 

I have 2 favorite spots on this hike.  This is one of them.  To the left would be the river.  People are kayaking down it while to the right of this trail is a dirt road that the older boys were riding their bikes.  

 About the third time we went to Stinchcolm, we went there for the purpose of swinging off this tree and jumping into the river.  Well, I say "we" but I don't get in water that I can't see through.  So I gladly was the picture taker!

 Brigham is the whole reason we went.  He isn't big into hiking but once he saw that swing the first time we took them, he would not leave me alone about going back.  He asked me daily until we finally went for Family Home Evening one night.  And I'm really glad that we did.  

 (David fixing the rope on a different trip there.  Someone had removed the other one and so my monkey husband got right up there to put it further out and fix it so that wasn't so close to the water.  This was our second time at the swing)

 This is my other favorite spot.  David and I followed some deer out here on our very first time there.  But it is off the trail and was hard to find on all the other times we went out.  Sometimes I couldn't even find it.  But I love this picture because it reminds me of the boys kinda freaking out as the mosquitoes were attacking us.  It is the only part of this hike where it happens every time.  It is so beautiful at this part but you can't stay long at all.  By the time that David had finished taking the picture the boys were running back to the trail and complaining about how much they LOVE nature.  How they would much rather experience it on TV!  It was hilarious laughing at them talking about the "mammoth mosquitoes" and such.

April came to stay with me for a week to help me.  While she was here, I took her on this hike.  We found a turtle on the path.  She picked the little guy and up and he peed and peed and peed!  

I really do love this place but unfortunately we won't be back for a bit.  I came home with a tick on me and those mosquitoes were just getting worse and worse with each time we went out.  I think we are going to have to wait until the Fall to come back out.

Mental Retreat

David took me on a "mental retreat" a few weekends ago.  Just before, I could feel something inside me hurting deeply.  My medicine was working so well prior to that.  So well.  But I got sick and wasn't handling Ruger well and I found myself crying more and more.  I knew I needed to get away.  So I asked David if we could do just that.  

Of course, he was all over that.  Mom and Dad were more than willing to help with the kids.  Just a few days later something significant happened with my health and it turned out I needed the get away more than I realized.  I was forced to get off one of my medications because it really messed me up emotionally.  It put me in a really dark place.  You hear people say things like, "I can't put into words what it was like..." and I find myself not wanting to journal that.  Because it feels hollow.  Because even that can't be put into words right.

It's so hard to climb out of that hole when you believe that what you are seeing, outside of you is something you can't have or even deserve.  It's so hard to explain.  It's a horrible, wretched way to live.  Having expressed that though, I'm truly grateful though that my husband knew how serious it was and helped me on this path to health quickly.  That path included the original plan of the "mental getaway."

Tulsa is close to a half way mark to Mom and Dad so that is where David and I stayed.  I really wanted to be somewhere where we could be in nature.  Something that helped me while I was in Utah was to go on hikes.  So David found a place in the Jenks area that had a great place for that.

 I almost immediately felt at peace.

I do not like to camp but I truly love to hike.  There is something so inviting to me with it.  I feel close to my Heavenly Father there.  I feel safe.  I don't worry.  Life is simple.  

David was in pain because he had a bunch of canker sores in his mouth.  I knew he had been very stressed with worrying about me, which causes cold sores but he put on a smile during this whole weekend and hiked with me 3 times during those 2 days that we stayed in Jenks/Tulsa.  He was patient with me as he just talked to me and tried to figure out what would be best to help me de-stress my life. 

We walked and talked and listened and then realized and recognized more things as the weekend went on.  We didn't leave that weekend knowing exactly how to change everything to "fix" me.  But at least there was a path set before me.  And there was light shining on that path.  We'll get there.

Be Gentle With Yourself, Alisa.

Levi's Braces

I think most dentists will send their young patients on to referrals to orthodontists, even if they seem to have straight teeth.  I'm a good example of that.  I have what I would consider "straight" teeth but I think I was in middle school when I was given retainers.  I lost them shortly after and so they never got "fixed" but that is ok because I like my teeth.  When the dentist told us that Brigham should go see an orthodonist I thought, "Are you kidding me?  His teeth are great!"  But I didn't say anything because maybe he is self conscious about something I'm not aware of.   I asked him if he wanted to go and he said, 'No way!"

Levi, on the other hand, has been wanting braces for years.  We just hadn't been able to do it for different reasons.  And as you can see from his mold below, he most certainly needs them not only for his over bite, but for crowding issues as well as straightening.  So Levi is a little late in the game for braces but I'm kinda glad because he is for sure responsible enough for them.  Other than that pop drinking of his, he is really good at sticking to all the rules of what not to eat and how to brush.

 Normally I would never consider taking Ruger to something like this but I kinda had to.  And you know what?  He really surprised me!  He was pretty interested in what that they were doing and watched for quite a while.

Levi was nervous about what to expect as far as the pain but as he usually does, he rarely complained afterwards.  He and Ruger have the highest pain tolerance I've ever witnessed on anyone.  David didn't tell Levi this before he got the braces but David told me that when he got his that he felt like the following day like someone was ripping out his teeth.  It only felt like that for a day but for that day it was really painful.  Levi hardly said a word.  I gave him some Aleve and he was good.  He said, "That really helped Mom."  That kid!  I have so many stories like that about him and pain.