Because He Loves Me Anyway

I wanted to share something I learned on Sunday in Sacrament meeting.  I was so very grateful for it because it was well timed as well as much needed.

My calling in church has been very stressful.  I am serving in Primary and though I love the kids (and I have said for years now that if I have a calling, I want it to be in Primary.  So yes, I truly do love Primary.) it has been difficult this time around.  I have been in a Primary Presidency before but I am definitely struggling this time.  

I have been in this calling for a little over a year now.  I don't know if I struggle so much because this calling has been during a very difficult period in our family's life or if it's because of the lack of involvement from some of those called to the positions in Primary but it has been difficult none the less.  And when a calling is difficult, it can be hard to feel the Spirit at church.

So when Brother Bitter spoke in Sacrament meeting on Sunday, and I felt the Spirit so strongly, I knew that I better journal it.

He first spoke on the importance of those who have sacrificed so much in the military.  He spoke with admiration of our Veterans.  He had the Veterans in the audience raise their hands.  But then he wanted all of us to raise our hand because he said that we were all Veterans.

I have to admit that I did not raise my hand.  I did not want to take anything away from those Veterans there and certainly not those that I love in my life that have given up so much for our country.  It felt wrong...until he told us why we were all Veterans.  He began to speak about the War in Heaven and how we all fought in that war.  He had no doubt that it was a very difficult war for us as we saw loved ones choose Lucifer's plan.  But we were valiant.  We were indeed Veterans.  Suddenly it didn't seem so wrong to raise my hand.

Then he spoke about the war we are involved in today.  How we are bombarded with evil things constantly.  It made me think of how very important it is to make sure that my family has proper tools to protect themselves with.  To protect themselves with!  I have the typical mom tendency to want to fix their problems.  To hover at times.  But if I don't give them the tools and let them exercise what I am trying to teach them, just what type of an adult will I be guiding into this world in a few years?

He then spoke of his own children.  How he would never let his young children watch certain things.  And yet we as adults can rationalize watching those same things.  Well, because we are adults, right?!  And when our children become teenagers they too will feel as if they are mature enough to watch certain things.  When they become 21 they will become mature enough to drink.  And we can add so many things to this list as they age.

But he said something I will not forget anytime soon.

Jesus was never "mature" enough to be a part of a lot of things that we let ourselves be a part of.

Jesus would not watch a rated R movie and as much as we would like to justify even a PG13 movie, we know He wouldn't watch that either.

I know we are not Jesus.  And it's foolish to think I could ever be even close to His perfect example while in this very imperfect world.  But that doesn't mean that I should not try a little harder.  I'm so very grateful for Brother Bitter's talk.  I have so many things that I need to improve upon.  So many things.  But I will try to do better.  It wasn't one of those talks where I walked away feeling guilty because I wasn't good enough.  I feel like I am in a good place in my life.  Not because I am doing everything right.  But because I am at a place in my life where I can accept that I mess up.  A lot.  And that is ok.  Because of my dear Savior and His atoning sacrifice, I will continue to be forgiven because I will continue to try harder to be better.  And I will mess up again.  And that is ok too.

Because He loves me anyway.