Things You Can't Take Back

On Saturday evening we were ready to read scriptures as a family but couldn't seem to find the scriptures that we usually used.  So, I suggested that we read something from the Ensign instead.  David liked that idea and the boys picked an article, in the June issue, called "My Exploding Peaches."  Of course, they just thought it sounded funny so that is why they picked it.  But funny how things work because I already had an activity planned out for Family Home Evening the following Monday and this article fit perfectly with it. 

 

It spoke of a woman's experience with canning peaches that ended up exploding in a steamer when all the water had evaporated.  Peach goo as well as glass was all over her kitchen.  Because she was tired she left the clean up for the next day.  But when she went to clean it up the following day, it had hardened so much that it was almost impossible to get it all cleaned up.

 

As she was trying her hardest to clean it up, she heard the Spirit speak to her that these hard mounds of peaches and glass were like the hurtful and angry words that sometimes spewed from her mouth.  You can't take them back.  No matter how hard we try, they are always out there and they cause great damage.

 

After we read the story, David said something that I feel strongly about and I'm so grateful he pointed it out to the boys.  He told them that sometimes people will say terrible things.  Or sometimes they will say things that they don't think are a big deal to someone else, but to that other person it was so very hurtful.  And sometimes those who caused the hurt will respond with something like, "It's not my fault you were so offended."  He explained to the boys that we can't walk around in life just saying whatever we want and not expect consequences.   Whether someone takes something that you said in the wrong way or not, we are still responsible for what we said.  It is our responsibility to make sure that the other person understands what we really meant.  But the thing that is most hurtful is when someone meant to be rude (maybe because they themselves were hurt) and never recognizes to the other person that what they said might have hurt because THEY said it.  Not because the other person took what was said in a way that offended them.

 

I myself have witnessed as others have said very hurtful things to someone else only to respond with, "That's their problem that they took it that way."  Or, "They just need to get over it."  It is so sad to me that we live in such a prideful world that we can't even admit that what we have done just might have hurt someone and all they had to do was say something as simple as, "I'm sorry.  I never should have said that."

 

Saying sorry may not be able to take what was said back, but at least the other person knows that the person who said what they did cares about them enough to want to make it right.

 So Monday evening rolled around and we headed outside for Family Home Evening.  I knew that what we were about to do would get messy so there was no way we were doing this inside!

 

I gave each of the boys a can of shaving cream.  I told them to take the cans and get all the shaving cream out.  They were more than happy to do that!  But just before I could sense that they couldn't hold it in any longer, without getting it on each other, I told them to put the shaving cream that they had gotten out of the can back into the can.  Brigham said, "We can't.  It's impossible!"

 

I then reminded them of the story we read Saturday night.  How we can't take back our hurtful words.  When I asked them to get the shaving cream out of the can, without thinking they did it.  Never once thinking that there might be consequences.  This is like words we say that might hurt someone else.  Once it is out there, it is out there and we can't take it back.

 I have to admit that it was very hard to keep their attention though because they wanted sooooo badly to get it all over each other.  So I quickly ended it and let them have at it!

They had so much fun!  And even after their showers that night they smelled sooooooo good!